In yet another case of the internet ruining everything, Die Hard has gone from an action movie that everyone loves (because it’s fantastic and flawless and lean as a bean) to a living, breathing example of why endlessly rewatching movies ironically is bad.
Because yes, Die Hard is a Christmas movie, haven’t you heard? Hahaha, yeah good one Dave! I get it! Because it’s set during Christmas and it has a Christmassy song at the end! We’re so subversive and hip, aren’t we Dave? We order pizza on Christmas Day instead of making a roast, and we slam back beers during our annual live-tweet of an decades-old action movie because adulting is too hard, right Dave?
But good news, Dave and his insufferable Die Hard opinions have just been dealt a SEVERE blow, because Bruce Willis, the star of Die Hard, has come out and stated some real, true facts: “Die Hard is not a Christmas movie. It’s a god damn Bruce Willis movie.”
Those were Bruce Willis’ exact words at the conclusion of his Comedy Central Roast, starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ed Norton and Demi Moore among others. For the uninitiated: the Comedy Central Roast is an event where a celebrity gets “roasted” by their fellow celeb friends. Many jokes were cracked at Bruce Willis’ expense. Mainly: his movies are very similar, he can be an “a-hole”, Hudson Hawk was trash. Good stuff.
As is customary at these roasts, the subject of the roast gets to speak. And that’s when Bruce Willis dropped the “Die Hard is not a Christmas movie” bombshell.
Then he did a Harmonica solo.
Which is, I’m assuming, the Bruce Willis version of a mic drop.
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