Back off, Marie Kondo! This book hoarder refuses to tidy up

Here’s one of the many walls of bookcases — color-coded for fun — in my apartment.

Bonnie Burton/Techhnews

When you walk into my apartment the first thing you see is the wall of floor-to-ceiling bookcases in my living room. There are two more bookcases in my kitchen, three bookcases in my hallway and another wall of bookcases in my bedroom.

Altogether, I have 20 bookcases in my apartment and they are full to capacity.

Each bookcase is jam-packed with books, comics and geeky collectibles like R2-D2 pepper grinders, a Doctor Who Tardis pencil holder and a taxidermy mouse dressed as Harry Potter.  Everything is color coded to keep my brain from buzzing from too much visual stimulus.

Needless to say, if decluttering Jedi Master Marie Kondo walked into my apartment, she’d have a heart attack.

As host of the Netflix show Tidying Up With Marie Kondo (which launched Jan. 1), the friendly Japanese woman is famous for her huge smile and her no-nonsense approach when it comes to paring down all your worldly possessions into a minimalist fantasy land.

Her mantra “Does this item spark joy?” has been muttered with both adoration and anger by anyone who has also read her bestselling self-help book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying.

In her book and her new Netflix show, she teaches hopeless hoarders and clutter-freaks the KonMari method of gathering all your belongings, one category at a time (like clothes, toys, electronics, etc.) and then keeping only those things that “spark joy” or give you a good feeling.

There’s nothing more terrifying than seeing a mountain of mismatched socks, out-of-style dresses, worn-out T-shirts and too-tight jeans in the middle of the room. I can say her method works wonders on old clothes, kitchen gear, electronics and paperwork.

For me, I was horrified that I had not one but three waffle makers in my home. After I sincerely thanked them for their service (as Kondo suggests you do with every item you own), I ended up giving the waffle makers to friends who would actually use them. 

In her Netflix show, Kondo uses her signature organizing skills to help people who desperately need guidance. She teaches busy families how to keep the never-ending tide of kids’ toys at bay, their Christmas ornaments in boxes in the garage, and their underwear neatly folded and stored vertically inside dresser drawers. 

But once the show decided to focus on book collectors, I suddenly realized that I couldn’t be a complete Kondo convert. I will never, ever willingly reduce my stacks of books and comics.


Here’s a wall of comics, graphic novels, art and collectibles tucked away in more of my bookcases.

Bonnie Burton/Techhnews

In Episode 5 called From Students to Improvements, Kondo tells a young couple: “Take every single book into your hands and see if it sparks joy for you.”

If you only own 25 books, that’s easy enough. But when you’re like me, surrounded my wall-to-wall bookcases crammed with books and comics, her advice could mean spending years holding book after book and trying to sense the electricity of excitement in each one. I don’t think I’ll live that long. 

In her book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, Kondo advises that you merely touch a book — not read it — to decide it’s fate. “Make sure you don’t start reading it,” she says. “Reading clouds your judgment.”

What the….?!

“Books are the reflection of your thoughts and values,” Kondo says on her show. “By tidying books, it will show you what kind of information is important to you at this moment.”

But that’s not what books are for. They aren’t there to quickly dole out the information you need right now. That’s what Wikipedia is for. Books exist to pique your curiosity, take you to imaginary worlds and let you step into the shoes of your heroes. 


Even my bedroom has a wall of bookcases full of color-coded books.

Bonnie Burton/Techhnews

Books remind me that the world is full of creativity, mystery and love. Books help me escape from the rigors of the real world. 

If I can’t afford to fly to Paris, I can at least read a book like Ernest Hemingway’s A Moveable Feast. If I get homesick for San Francisco, all I have to do is pick up my well-worn copy of Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin. 

And if I want to know how to get away with murder, my hardcover editions by Agatha Christie, Arthur Conan Doyle and Patricia Highsmith are right at my fingertips. These books not only spark joy. They spark my imagination. 

A vast book collection isn’t just about keeping the books you’ve read, but to give you an ample supply of books you want to read. The bonus of a personal library being, unlike a public library, there’s no rush for you to finish the book to avoid late fees. 

You can take your sweet time reading your own books. You can write in the margins without horrifying a librarian. You can bring them into a bubble bath without fear of retribution.

Staring at a wall of books also motivates me to write more. Maybe my constant desire to see my name on the spine of a book is due to vanity, or perhaps I am hoping to leave behind a lasting legacy as an author. But my book collection encourages me not to give up on my own career as a writer, even when I suffer from crippling Impostor Syndrome.

My books reflect who I am more than any dating profile or Twitter bio can. In addition to fiction, I collect books about art, history, politics, crafts, true crime, fashion, home decor, houseplants and magic.

Pick a book from my shelves and I promise I’ll have a story to tell about my hunt for a first edition, an embarrassing author signing or a gift from a long-lost lover. Every book is special to me, whether I’ve already read it or not. Every book has its own built-in spark. 

If you need any extra incentive to ignore Kondo’s advice about books, here’s what filmmaker John Waters once said: “Collect books, even if you don’t plan on reading them right away. Nothing is more important than an unread library.” 

On that note, Waters also said: “If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t f**k them.” 

Now that’s what I call sparking joy.

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